Thursday, September 12, 2024

A particularly American gut ache



I got the second worst food poisoning of my life the day they held the 2000 US election. It was some dodgy Burger King, and I was so sick I couldn't really sleep, and could only fade in and out of consciousness, while American news networks breathlessly covered the race between Gore and Bush for the White House.

There was, of course, no result that night, except in my fevered dreams, where I'm sure they announced at one point that the cookie Monster had won Ohio.

And to be honest, looking at the state of US politics over the past quarter century since, where the worst impulses of the American electorate have grown to grotesque and deeply embarrassing proportions, I'm not convinced that fever dream ever ended.

The worst food poisoning I ever had was from some KFC, the night before my big High School science exam. I got a B+, which was pretty good, when I was so queasy I couldn't read the words, but I didn't eat at the Colonel's for five years after that, and then I've been a fiend for it ever since. But the fate of the fucking free world wasn't at stake that night.

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