The kid was going to destroy GI Joes that are proper relics, sacred to my ego, so I did the only sane thing and spent $40 getting replacements for them that the kid can play with, so my old ones are saved.
I didn't tell the people I bought them from what I was doing with them, they had kept them so safe. They're in great condition, with no paint fading or scrapes - the Cobra Commander even has his gun and backpack. And and now they're in the hands of a rampaging creature of pure id.
If Toy Story is real and toys really do have feelings, I'm a goddamn monster. But if I believe anything, it's that toys are made to be played with.
Sorry new Techno. You look great, but you're fucked.
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